After Godzilla Raids Again, the King of the Monsters stayed frozen in ice for the next 7
years. During that time, Toho, the company who makes these movies, continued the kaiju
trend with Rodan, The Mysterians, Varan, and later, Mothra. It wasn’t until 1962 that
Godzilla finally broke out of the ice, in one of the most legendary films ever made... King
Kong vs Godzilla.
Having the two most recognized giant movie monsters ever created fight each other was pure genius. The American monster against the Japanese kaiju. Who’s going to win? That’s what we’re going to find out.
Before I get to reviewing the actual film, let’s do a little comparison, like checking the stats
of MMA fighters before the round. Except this is much cooler than MMA. Let’s look at Godzilla. His size varies, depending on which movie series you’re watching, but this
version is about 50 meters, or about 150 ft tall. His weight is around 20,000 tons. He has atomic fire breath, armored scales that have yet to be penetrated by any weapon known to man at this point in the series, and on top of that, he’s radioactive. He’ll give you 27 1⁄2 different types of cancer if he doesn’t crush you, eat you, or set you ablaze. The only weakness known at this point is the Oxygen Destroyer... but nobody knows how to make the device, because all files on it were burned, and the guy who made it died with his invention. The only thing that will stop him is burial. If you want him gone for a while, use ice. The cold temperatures mess him up. The only drawback to this is that he’ll just come back EXTRA pi$$ed off.
As for King Kong, he’s... not too great. He’s only about 25 ft tall, and has no powers like Godzilla does. He’s weak, too. Machine gun bullets from some biplanes were enough to kill him. Realistically, the fight would last 5 seconds... well, not that anything here is too
realistic to begin with. But still, there is no way King Kong could stand a chance. But, Toho had a solution to this. They made Kong a rubber suit, and about the same height as Godzilla. They also gave him the ability to gain strength from electricity, and use it to shock Godzilla with every punch. Why? Well... it’s a long story. I would suggest looking into this on your own, but I’ll just give you the basics. Originally, King Kong’s role in the film was meant for Frankenstein. No joke. It was scrapped, but Toho used the idea of a Godzilla sized Frankenstein monster fighting another kaiju in a film called Frankenstein Conquers the World. Interesting little tidbit of information.
Now King Kong has a chance against Godzilla, and we finally have the perfect setup for the greatest monster fight ever put on screen. Let’s see how it goes.
The movie takes little time to release Godzilla from the ice he was stuck in, and he
Having the two most recognized giant movie monsters ever created fight each other was pure genius. The American monster against the Japanese kaiju. Who’s going to win? That’s what we’re going to find out.
Before I get to reviewing the actual film, let’s do a little comparison, like checking the stats
of MMA fighters before the round. Except this is much cooler than MMA. Let’s look at Godzilla. His size varies, depending on which movie series you’re watching, but this
version is about 50 meters, or about 150 ft tall. His weight is around 20,000 tons. He has atomic fire breath, armored scales that have yet to be penetrated by any weapon known to man at this point in the series, and on top of that, he’s radioactive. He’ll give you 27 1⁄2 different types of cancer if he doesn’t crush you, eat you, or set you ablaze. The only weakness known at this point is the Oxygen Destroyer... but nobody knows how to make the device, because all files on it were burned, and the guy who made it died with his invention. The only thing that will stop him is burial. If you want him gone for a while, use ice. The cold temperatures mess him up. The only drawback to this is that he’ll just come back EXTRA pi$$ed off.
As for King Kong, he’s... not too great. He’s only about 25 ft tall, and has no powers like Godzilla does. He’s weak, too. Machine gun bullets from some biplanes were enough to kill him. Realistically, the fight would last 5 seconds... well, not that anything here is too
realistic to begin with. But still, there is no way King Kong could stand a chance. But, Toho had a solution to this. They made Kong a rubber suit, and about the same height as Godzilla. They also gave him the ability to gain strength from electricity, and use it to shock Godzilla with every punch. Why? Well... it’s a long story. I would suggest looking into this on your own, but I’ll just give you the basics. Originally, King Kong’s role in the film was meant for Frankenstein. No joke. It was scrapped, but Toho used the idea of a Godzilla sized Frankenstein monster fighting another kaiju in a film called Frankenstein Conquers the World. Interesting little tidbit of information.
Now King Kong has a chance against Godzilla, and we finally have the perfect setup for the greatest monster fight ever put on screen. Let’s see how it goes.
The movie takes little time to release Godzilla from the ice he was stuck in, and he
obviously goes on a rampage through Japan. While that’s going on, a Japanese TV
company decides to send a few guys to a distant island to collect a special type of berry
that could revolutionize the field of medicine. Being a distant island, there’s obviously a
bunch of primitive natives who worship their ‘god’. Surprise, it’s King Kong. This part of the
movie is island native stereotype central. Thought the original Kong nailed that stereotype?
This is the grand champion. At least it was the grand champion of 1962. Anyway, the TV
crew befriends the island people by giving them a radio... and passing out cigarettes. They
even give one to a little kid. It’s messed up.
Meanwhile, Godzilla continues to leave a path of destruction through Japan. For some reason, the first solution anyone comes up with to stop Godzilla, is using an atomic bomb. Yeah, that’s the most sensible solution. Feed the kaiju the stuff that created him and makes him more powerful. That won’t go wrong. And why does Japan even have atomic weapons to begin with? I’m no history expert, but after World War 2, I thought Japan banned atomic weapons from being used in their country. It was even stated in Godzilla 1985 that they can’t use them.... so WHAT THE HECK WERE THEY THINKING HERE? Who knows? It was probably something that Americans put in when they dubbed it.
Speaking of which, just like in King of the Monsters, they chopped this film up and put in some American actors again. They’re only stuck in some news room this time, but it’s still just a weak attempt to digest it for American audiences. Good thing this is the last time until 1985 that this happens. Moving on.
King Kong eventually reveals himself, does battle with an octopus, and gets drunk off of berry juice until he passes out. They get him on a raft and try to haul him to Japan, but that doesn’t work out too well. He escapes and goes on a rampage through Japan, headed in Godzilla’s direction. Of course, he gets a girl in his hand, just to follow tradition. Instead of climbing the tallest building in Tokyo, he just gets on top of the capitol building... which isn’t as impressive of a climb. And why is Tokyo existing? I thought the first Godzilla burned it to the ground and left it a radioactive mess. That was only about 8 years ago. There should be little to no Tokyo left in existence. But as the movie progresses, you’ll learn not to question the logic of it anymore. Just go with it.
In order to get Kong off the capitol building, they launch rockets full of berry juice to put him to sleep. But Godzilla is still on the loose. In order to solve that problem, they tie Kong to a bunch of balloons to transport him to Mt. Fuji to fight Godzilla so they can kill each other. I’m not joking. Balloons. This is the point where you say “Screw logic, screw the laws of physics, screw everything. I’ll just go with it.” And that amount of craziness is what prepares you for the main event.
Meanwhile, Godzilla continues to leave a path of destruction through Japan. For some reason, the first solution anyone comes up with to stop Godzilla, is using an atomic bomb. Yeah, that’s the most sensible solution. Feed the kaiju the stuff that created him and makes him more powerful. That won’t go wrong. And why does Japan even have atomic weapons to begin with? I’m no history expert, but after World War 2, I thought Japan banned atomic weapons from being used in their country. It was even stated in Godzilla 1985 that they can’t use them.... so WHAT THE HECK WERE THEY THINKING HERE? Who knows? It was probably something that Americans put in when they dubbed it.
Speaking of which, just like in King of the Monsters, they chopped this film up and put in some American actors again. They’re only stuck in some news room this time, but it’s still just a weak attempt to digest it for American audiences. Good thing this is the last time until 1985 that this happens. Moving on.
King Kong eventually reveals himself, does battle with an octopus, and gets drunk off of berry juice until he passes out. They get him on a raft and try to haul him to Japan, but that doesn’t work out too well. He escapes and goes on a rampage through Japan, headed in Godzilla’s direction. Of course, he gets a girl in his hand, just to follow tradition. Instead of climbing the tallest building in Tokyo, he just gets on top of the capitol building... which isn’t as impressive of a climb. And why is Tokyo existing? I thought the first Godzilla burned it to the ground and left it a radioactive mess. That was only about 8 years ago. There should be little to no Tokyo left in existence. But as the movie progresses, you’ll learn not to question the logic of it anymore. Just go with it.
In order to get Kong off the capitol building, they launch rockets full of berry juice to put him to sleep. But Godzilla is still on the loose. In order to solve that problem, they tie Kong to a bunch of balloons to transport him to Mt. Fuji to fight Godzilla so they can kill each other. I’m not joking. Balloons. This is the point where you say “Screw logic, screw the laws of physics, screw everything. I’ll just go with it.” And that amount of craziness is what prepares you for the main event.
The final fight is awesome. Watch the kaiju duke it out and beat the $h!t out of each other. So many great moments here. My favorite part is where Kong grabs a tree and shoves it down Godzilla’s throat. Kong is clearly at a disadvantage here. Godzilla overpowers him, but then Kong gets struck by lightning and gets strength back. This is the part that makes up for most of the flaws this film has.
In the end, both kaiju tumble into the ocean, and only Kong surfaces. Does that make him the winner? No! Godzilla sleeps in the ocean! He’s fine! He probably just got buried in all the rock. That doesn’t count as victory. Some idiot is bound to dump some radioactive waste or use an atomic bomb to wake him up anyway. So, I declare this battle... UNFINISHED.
Too bad they never have a rematch. This is a battle that’s been on hiatus for 52 years. It’s got to be concluded. If Gareth Edwards ever does make a sequel to his Godzilla movie, there better be one with King Kong in it.
But how did the movie itself stand up? Well, the dubbing is awful. I didn’t care for a single human character. The special effects were @$$. King Kong’s suit looks amazingly derpy. The logic made no sense. And I’m pretty sure I lost a lot of brain cells trying to comprehend the stupidity of it. A combination of all those elements make King Kong vs Godzilla.... the BEST WORST MOVIE EVER MADE. Let’s take a look at those perfect ingredients.
The dubbing, like I said, is awful. This is where the bad lip synching joke became really popular. The Japanese actors aren’t too great either. I didn’t care for a single one of them, I don’t remember their names, and I was just hoping Godzilla ate them.
The special effects are some of the worst I’ve seen. Especially the blue screen effects. They’re so... terrible. I can’t describe it. But I can describe the rest. The miniatures are okay. They crumble real nice, and the explosions aren’t too bad either. As for the kaiju themselves.... oh boy. King Kong’s rubber suit is one of the derpiest things I’ve seen in my life. Godzilla’s suit is alright. They changed the look, but kept the overall impression.
It is truly an experience that I cannot put into words alone. It needs to be seen to be believed. This gives a lot of stuff to make fun of, and a lot of great fights. If there’s any Godzilla film you MUST see, it’s this one.
FINAL RATING: 26 / 50: MUST WATCH.
STORY: 2 / 5
CHARACTERS: 0 / 5
ACTING/DUBBING: 0 / 5
SPECIAL EFFECTS: 1 / 5
ACTION: 4 / 5
SOUNDTRACK: 3 / 5
TONE: 1 / 5
ENJOYABILITY: 5 / 5
REWATCH VALUE: 5 / 5
OWNING VALUE: 5 / 5
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