We already know Godzilla is super strong… but I didn’t think he’d be able to withstand a BLACK HOLE!!!
You’d think the Millenium series would be an actual series, but it’s really a series of reboots. Let me explain. Godzilla 2000 was a reboot to the franchise that ignored all other films except for the original Gojira. The film made after it, Godzilla vs Megaguirus, is yet another reboot, which ignores Godzilla 2000 as well as every other film, except for, once again, the original. Don’t ask me why they did that twice in a row.
This film, unlike the last one, gives some backstory. Godzilla first attacked in 1954, and apparently he never died, so he came back in 1966 to feed off of a nuclear power plant. In order to prevent more attacks, Japan got rid of nuclear energy, and tried other means of getting power. They finally decided to use plasma energy, but that attracted Godzilla yet again.Finally, some time in the 90’s, an anti-Godzilla organization was formed. He began to resurface in the year 2001, so the ‘G-Graspers’ hired a guy to work on something called the Dimension Tide. It’s a miniaturized black hole generator that uses the black holes as projectile weapons, and they plan on using it against Godzilla. I might not be a black hole expert, but I do know this is FREAKING RIDICULOUS. Godzilla has had insane things before, but this takes the cake. A black hole gun is what we have resorted to in order to stop Godzilla. It’s nice that they’re coming up with new ways to stop him, instead of the same old tanks and jets, but a black hole gun? If Godzilla is so strong that it takes this drastic of measures… then pop out the alcohol, because the world is screwed.
3 months later, they have the first test. It works, but it also creates a wormhole in the space time continuum. Apparently, they don’t leave anyone to monitor it, so everyone is completely oblivious to the prehistoric dragonfly that comes out of it and lays an egg in the forest. It hatches, and all the sudden, there’s a swarm of these things terrorizing cities.
The G-graspers track Godzilla to a small island where they try to shoot him with a black hole, but the swarm arrives, making it hard to lock on. The insects start extracting Godzilla’s DNA, but he manages to kill most of them. They have to be the most annoying enemies Godzilla’s ever fought. His frustration can be seen easily. After he clears the skies a little, the Dimension Tide fires, sucks up half the island with it…. and Godzilla walks away thinking “Oh, what a minor inconvenience”
Just to make that clear… Godzilla… walks away… from a black hole… a F***ing BLACK HOLE… is ineffective… against Godzilla…. There are no words to describe how amazingly that does not work. I could look at this with a positive view, thinking, ‘Yup, that’s why he’s King’… But NO!!!! That does not work!!! Godzilla has defied the laws of physics several times before, but this is the most outrageous it’s gotten! So, let’s just throw logic out the window and go with it.
The remaining swarm members return to their nest in a flooded city, and inject Godzilla’s DNA into their queen, who is referred to as Megaguirus. She’s a decently designed kaiju, nothing more than a mean version of Mothra. I’m serious, this thing is MEAN. She can flap her wings real fast to cause sonic disruptor… thingies… and her stinger extracts the energy of anything she jams it into.
A little bit later, the two kaiju meet for the big fight. This is definitely the most annoyed I’ve ever seen Godzilla in any of his movies. Megaguirus doesn’t fight fair at all. She keeps knocking him down and slamming him into things. She jams her stinger into.. his crotch… ow… and starts draining all his energy so he can’t use his atomic breath. Instead, she gets the ability to shoot an atomic beam! There’s one part where she is about to drop a building on Godzilla, and I swear I saw her grin right before she dropped it. She knows she’s evil. But when Godzilla gets annoyed, he gets mad. The best part of the entire movie is when he does a body slam! It’s great!
After an awesome fight, Godzilla is able to bite off her stinger and get his energy back so he can FRY that bug! Finally, the humans shoot the black hole at him, and it actually works… or does it!?! It’s hinted at the end that he may have escaped his black hole prison. At this point, I’m surprised there isn’t a “Because he’s Godzilla” meme on the internet like there is a “Because I’m Batman” meme, because if he can go through all this, then I would declare him just as cool as Batman. Funny thing how both Legendary and Warner Brothers made the Dark Knight Trilogy, and the upcoming Godzilla.
This film tends to get overlooked, but I like it a lot! Not only is the story and action better than Godzilla 2000, but so are the human characters. They are pretty good, for a Godzilla movie, and I don’t remember hating a single one of them. I think the fact that I was watching the subtitled version helped. The biggest leap is the special effects. The green screen and compositing effects are astronomically better than the last movie! Another perk is the return of miniature city props. They look great, and in contrast with the kaiju, a lot more believable than the crappy effects Godzilla 2000. There was a couple parts where the strings holding Megaguirus were visible, but it’s only for one scene that takes place at night. In the daytime shots, they’re not seen at all. Like Godzilla 2000, though, there are some CG parts. Mostly, they’re for the swarm of bugs, and it doesn’t look that bad, given the time and budget. There are some CG shots of Godzilla when he’s underwater, which still look awful. But for the most part, the effects in this movie were pretty good.
I would suggest watching this subtitled. I find Godzilla movies a lot easier to take seriously when I don’t have to listen to bad dubbing. And if you’re against reading, then I’m sorry. There’s no hope for you.
This is a pretty good movie. Megaguirus is one of Godzilla’s most formidable foes, the action is fun, and the soundtrack is alright.
FINAL RATING: 38 / 50
STORY: 3 / 5
ACTING: 3 / 5
CHARACTERS: 3 / 5
SPECIAL EFFECTS: 4 / 5
ACTION: 5 / 5
SOUNDTRACK: 4 / 5
TONE: 3 / 5
ENJOYABILITY: 5 / 5
REWATCH VALUE: 4 / 5
OWNING VALUE: 4 / 5
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